Man in Llama smuggling shame

Richard Madeley look-a-like in Llama smuggling scandal

As news broke of Johnny Depp’s confession that he illegally smuggled his pet dog into Australia, news reaches Toast Towers that a Richard Madeley look-a-like tried to smuggle his pet Llama into Serbia.

It is alleged that Sam Fabric, 44 from Kent was driving to Belgrade when he was stopped by officials on the motorway.

Sam, who makes his living attending the opening of shops and the occasional shoplifting from Bargain Booze was forced to open the boot of his car where to everyone’s surprise was his pet llama, Alan.

Sam claims he didn’t know Alan was in the car despite getting onto the continent via the Channel Tunnel and driving through various countries.

It is believed Sam was travelling to “Llamageddon”, an annual Llama fighting event held in Belgrade and definitely not a small town in Wales when he was stopped.

Nemanja Trouserfield, a spokesman for the Serbian authorities told an MoT source, “We are trying to crack down on this Llama fighting as it’s cruel and unkind to the animals”.

Alan is currently being cared for by a specialist Llama team whilst the investigation continues.

llamaAlan, yesterday

If charged and found guilty, Sam could spend up to 10 years in prison and even face the death penalty.

We contacted Amnesty International to ask if they were aware of Sam’s plight but were told, “We’re not arsed to be fair.  Serves the fucker right for looking like Richard Madeley.  Let him rot

Judy Finnigan was unsuitable for comment. 

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