Now that PPI is coming to an end there's a new kind of Insurance claim.

If you've been poorly on a package holiday you can claim some money back, and thus drive up foreign holiday prices for everyone else in the process.

That's right, people like are running adverts about being sick due to shit food on an all inclusive holiday.

Running a catchy song which includes the line "If your meat was raw and your bum was sore" the company claims to get you a substantial return of your holiday money.

Thing is, this is so open to fraud it's unreal.  Everyone gets poorly on a foreign holiday to some extent, a change in water, too much food or simply drinking too much and then blaming someone else.

"Oh those 15 Sangria's last night.... I was as sick as a dog, must have been that plate of chips I ate"

Which brings me on to a new Insurance Policy offered by Monkey on Toast Fraudulent Insurance PLC:


That's right, if you caught a nasty STI whilst on holiday, contact us today!

We've even got an advert lined up:

If it burns when you pee when you've been to Turkey,

if you came out in a rash after plundering some gash,

If you had some dodgy muff out in Magaluf

If your dick went raw after shagging a foreign whore



Calls cost £100 per minute, you may not get anything back, we might laugh at you.

Terms and cuntditions apply.


Copyright © 2000-2021 Monkey on Toast. All rights Reserved.