Swipe left, swipe right.

Mr Miyagi taught The Karate Kid all about Tinder.

The world of online dating seems to have changed massively over the last 10 years or so, with the advent of apps designed to give you that instant hit.

I used online dating many, many years ago.

In fact, I met my first wife online.

Well, being a Thai bride I met her a couple of weeks after clicking “Add to Cart” on the site I was perusing.

I told a friend my bride to be was 150 pounds, to which he claimed, “That’s cheap!

Turned out that was her weight.

Postage and packing was a fucking killer on that as well.

Sadly the relationship didn’t work out and I wished I’d had her shipped by Yodel, then I’d have never met her.

People often claim to be something they’re not when dating online.

For instance, I met my 2nd wife online when I was pretending to be a 15 year old lad, sadly for me she was a police officer pretending to be a 14 year old girl.

Still, she saw the funny side and we got married!

(Due to there being a large number of people who are hard of thinking, AKA idiots, I must stress that I have NEVER been online pretending to be a 15 year old lad in order to talk to and meet 14 year old girls.  I said I was 14 as well.)

Anyway, the point being is that online dating has evolved hugely.  Nowadays I believe people use apps called Tinder, Plenty of Fish and ShallowTwats to find the "love" of their lives.

The user is presented with a picture of a would-be suitor and they swipe one direction to keep it and another direction to destroy their lives, rendering the poor bastard with less self-confidence than Whitney Houston.

And that is the way of the world now.  Short termism.

Nobody is thinking about the future anymore, it’s all swipe left, meet up, fuck (or kill) and forget.

Where’s the romance gone?

I’ve seen messages sent to other people on some of these apps, they’re just creepy!  And it works both ways too, it’s not limited to just one gender.

The internet has enabled us to do some brilliant things in life, it’s made life a lot easier but at the same time it’s made us more crude, more angry, more OH JUST FUCK OFF.

Not you!  I wasn’t talking to you, dear reader.

Look back at some of the stuff that’s gone on over the last few years, things like Facebook and Twitter has really made people aggressive, and their anger is directed at people whereas before these apps or sites were available it would have just been a passing comment to their mates.

Before phones had cameras we weren’t carrying around a digital camera to snap stupid people in the street. 

Before that we didn’t carry a Polaroid Instamatic.

Before that we didn’t have an entourage featuring an out of work court sketch artist.

We didn’t wish cancer on a celebrity in the street, or hope the first born of a footballer was brain dead vegetable.

So why do we do it now?

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