Just had a fight in Asda

It's that time of year again!  I'd say there's 4 to 5 shopping days left, until Christmas?  No, that's 8.

No, I'm talking about until we see a load of lying arseholes take to social media (Twitter is particularly rife for this) and claim they've just had a fight in Asda, Tesco, Sainsbury's.

In my 44 years on this planet I have NEVER witnessed a fight in a supermarket, especially at Christmas.

It's always a fight over something random or innocuous as well, never a fight over the last turkey or beef joint.

"I've just had a fight with an old woman over the last half portion of cucumber in Aldi!", claims one bullshitting bastard.

No you haven't.

"Just seen 2 old women fighting over the last tin of Petite Pois in my local Spar"


I just don't understand why people feel the need to do this!  I've been for a last minute shop on Christmas Eve before, yes it sucks and it's busy as hell but were there people fighting?  No, because I don't live in a world of made-up horseshit.

Now, I follow quite a few people on Twitter who, shall we say, "expose" their lives on social media more than they probably should.  They're funny people, some of their tweets are clearly a modified version of the truth.  The reason for this is to make it funny.  In the same way when a comedian tells a story and says "this is absolutely true" you know it's unlikely to be, but it's funny and that's the point.

Anyway, even those people mentioned above don't even fall in to this category.

These people are just attention grabbing idiots and to be honest the novelty wore off about 3 years ago.  Now it's just the same stories with a different object (last salmon / gammon / arctic roll) in a different supermarket.

Please stop this shit, it doesn't happen and if it did it wouldn't be on the scale that these cretins report on Twitter!