Accidental hero

As I mentioned in the last update, there’s been a raft of Compensation Cretins, sorry, law firms looking to take up cases on behalf of people who may have had accidents.

The cold calls or intrusive text messages often begin “… regarding your accident

Haven’t had an accident?  No, weird that isn’t it?

I’ve actually tried to play these firms long before to try to get them to admit to being fraudulent. 

My accident?  I’m sorry I haven’t HAD an accident… BUT, if you put a claim in for one I’ll split the money with you 50-50

Alas it never goes any further but it is annoying.  These people aren’t buying leads from insurance companies, they are literally cold calling or texting in the hope they hit someone (poor choice of words) who has had.

So with that in mind, why not string them along with a handy cut out and keep guide:

scissor me timbers

The Monkey on Toast Guide to Accident Cold Callers:

When you’re asked about your accident, claim you have had one.

When you’re asked for further details tell them you were driving your white Fiat Uno through a tunnel in Paris when it hit a speeding Mercedes Benz.

The Merc was a write off, fortunately your Uno only suffered some minor scrapes.

Then wait for the "But Sir, that's the death of Princess Diana you've just described"