beth wetter Gender fluid, liberal, pansexual radical feminist from Croydon.

 Some days I think there's only me.

gb news New news channel GB News launched on Sunday night and I for one am livid!

 However, it's not all doom and gloom because "Stop Funding Hate", a website and twitter account run by one man in his mum's boxroom has compiled a list of sponsors or people who advertise on the far right fascist news channel.

 

It's quite handy to have such a resource telling me who I should stop buying my products from and which brands to avoid because I'm not capable of thinking for myself.

I haven't even watched the channel, I'm only saying it's far right and fascist because that's what I've been told! *Titter*

So these are the companies and brands I'll stop using with immediate effect:

The National Lottery

I'll do the Post Code Lottery instead!

 

Virgin Media

Oh, they do provide my superfast cable internet.  I can always drop down to 20 megabits though, no worries.

 

Boots

Well, there's always Superdrug!

 

The Post Code Lottery

Oh that is a mither.

 

Starbucks

Hmm, I do love their cofee but Costa is available!

 

Co-Op

Easy, I'll go with someone else!

 

Weetabix and Kellogs

Oh.  Looks like it's own brand for me!

 

Deliveroo

Shit, I'll have to go with Just-Eat instead.

 

Amazon Prime

Oh.  That is a pain.

 

Google

Well, I for one will ditch my Android phone and get an iPhone instead.  I just need a search engine that can direct me towards suitable shops.

 

See, it's easy!  I can just stop using these well known brands and products!  They're funding hate after all.

Now I'm off to go for a Starbucks!

Shit, maybe not.

 

Now, where's my local Costa?  I'll just use Google Maps.... Oh, bother.

 

Now that we've opened up pubs, cafes and restaurants there's more people about.

And this frightens me!

Those nasty COVID germs are lurking everywhere, ready to pounce on me any second.

Which is why I've started wearing a facemask for bed.  No, I don't mean one of those eye masks with a rude word on, but the same facemask I wear to go to the shops.

Just think, whilst I'm asleep at night, sometimes with my mouth open, there's all manner of nasty bugs that could fly in from outside into my mouth.  All it takes is for someone with COVID five miles away to sneeze or cough whilst in bed and I'm getting that!  Imagine if that particle of COVID travelled those five miles, through my window and into my mouth.... I'm going to be ICU on a ventilator before you can say "PFIZER BIONTECH".

It's just too much of a risk, and that's why I'm wearing a mask for bed.  I've even put one on Sebastian just in case.  Isn't he adoreable?

beth wetter teddy bear

Hello my friends.

This is my first article for "Monkey", I hope you'll like it!

Now that we're allowed to go back in pubs to drink I've told my friends that I would rather stay outside instead!

I know we don't get the greatest weather here in the UK and I'm prepared to get rained on alot, but I just feel it's the safer option.

Why would I go indoors when I know I can't catch COVID when I'm sat outside?!

It makes no sense.  If my friends want to drink indoors then I'll just stay outside on my own, maybe we could get a live stream going on our phones so we can all be together?

When my friends all come round to mine to watch the latest gender queer TV shows we'll all be in the same room, that will be happy days!  But for now, whenever I go to the pub it's going to be outside in the sun, rain or snow for me, masked up the whole time.

Can't be too careful you know.

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