Cor blimey bloody charlie!  It's nearly December, where the hell has the year gone?

So where to start this issue?  Well how about the word "Vile"?

The dictionary defines it as follows:

There should be an addition to it, "Used by The Daily Mail and The Sun every bloody day"

Have you noticed its use?  It must be one of the most overused words in the papers of the last couple of years.

"Vile trolls attack [C-list knobhead]"

Everything a little disagreeable is always described as "vile".  Does my head in, it's like they're trying to make out it's the worst situation that's ever happened so they try to use it as the worst superlative they can find, but sadly it's been used to death so it no longer has the same meaning.

See also vile's very own anagram, "evil".

"Evil X does Y to Z"

I guess it sells papers but evil has been used so much over the years that it no longer has the same effect on us.

Twitter users love the use of vile too.  Vile Brexiteers, vile trolls, vile fucking shits.

Let's get some alternative words in play, eh kids?  Or are vile and evil just long enough not to confuse people?  The Daily Mail and Sun reading plebs would have to look up abhorrent.  Mind you, they'd probably think it's a new way to download films.



Trans women demand FGM


It's 2018....

and BANTZ are illegal.

So, if you read the article, you'll see that a bunch of students from Lancaster Uni are in a spot of bother over a set of T-Shirts they wore on a night out (to a student club).

The clothing had things like "I like 12 year olds" and "Gary Glitter Innocent".

Now, these might be distasteful "slogans" but it's clear the students were just mucking about.  I mean, it's not like they've gone out of their way to get professionally done T-shirts for god's sake, they're written on in felt fucking pen.

One idiot told the Independent, "The issue is that of a hate crime. It should have been reported to the police and those living on campus who could had [sic] been offended".

A hate crime?  What hate crime?  It's offensive to some, sure, which was clearly the aim of the "Snow Sports Society" as they call themselves, but where does this fit into a hate crime?  It doesn't, it's just another set of snowflake idiots trying to find offence in everything.  If you don't find it funny then so what, if you find the content offensive that doesn't necessarily mean you personally are offended, you do know you're capable of just turning away, yes?

To be personally offended surely it has to be directed at you?

I mean, that quote to the Indi, apart from it not making 100% sense (the student was probably drunk at the time), why should it have been reported to the police?  Why should it have been reported to people on campus?  Surely the best thing to do is not give them any publicity and they'll just not do it again when they realise they're not winding anyone up?

Not everything you don't like is a crime, yet.


Vegan Corner!

Vegans demand city name change


And finally...

Generation Snowflake: The Job Interview



Well, Theresa May is taking a battering today eh?  And rightly so, because the deal she's wanting to deliver on Brexit is worse than a No Deal.  

Ask Noel, he'll tell you.

I can see this being May's end.  Deliver a shit deal and resign - her very own mic drop moment but instead of the mic it's a big bag of dog shit.

Brexit is to May what Maddie was to Kate and Gerry.


Fake News!

According to the BBC, "Fake news is not only news you disagree with"


Really?  So we can have news now that's fake just because some mingewipe doesn't agree with it?

How on earth can there be ANY other definition of fake news other than it's news that is fabricated?


Goodbye Walking Dead

The Walking Dead is dead.


Speaking of The Walking Dead

The Walking Dead must be inclusive of Zombies says utter tit


Until next time!

Five people were arrested after they were filmed burning an effigy of the Grenfell Tower on Bonfire Night.

They were arrested after handing themselves in to police and held under suspicion of a Public Order Offence.

Now, no matter what you think of the act you have admit that a crime has NOT been committed here.

The Public Order Act 1986 covers intentional "harassment, alarm or distress" caused via the use of "threatening, abusive or insulting" words or signs.  Which this incident does not.

Offences committed on a private residence where a person "had no reason to believe" it would be "heard or seen by a person outside that or any other dwelling" are protected from prosecution under the act.  So, how on earth can they be arrested?

Yes, someone filmed it and some bad grass uploaded it.  But if the others all said that they had no knowledge it was being filmed and that nobody else should have witnessed it then it has to be case dismissed I'm afraid.

There's something quite worrying about this trend of people being arrested and, in some cases, taken to court (with a potential prison sentence in the offing) for OFFENDING.

Offending someone isn't a crime.  I'm not condoning or defending the Grenfell act, but what they did was in a private garden.  Some people got offended by it, tough shit.

If we're going to start arresting people for being offensive then are we going to start with people like Frankie Boyle and Jimmy Carr.  Their material can be deemed as offensive to some.

Are we going to arrest them?

"Oh, Jimmy made a rape joke!  He doesn't do that on Eight of out Ten Cats!"  

No, he fucking doesn't!  But if you go to see a comedian at a live gig and it says "Adults only" on the ticket then there's going to be some swearing and offensive material.

But then, offence is subjective.  Rape jokes might not offend me, because I know it's a joke and I know Jimmy doesn't really think that way.

I might get offended at jokes about something completely different, we're not all the same.  

Do all the younger millennial snowflake knobheads not have a sense of humour now?  Maybe that's it.  Mrs Brown's Boys and Miranda is peak comedy to them.  Comedy that hard working comedians from the 80's upwards worked hard to move on from.

Back to the point, no crime has been committed, a sick joke took place but so what!  Our rights are being eroded away but laws aren't changing, people can just be charged under Public Order Act OR even worse the Communications Act which basically has a catch all of "Fucking bang 'em up, charge 'em, fine 'em and notch another statistic up, Sarge" which is very, very worrying indeed.


Alexa, get me an article on...

Alexa and Siri shouldn't be women claims awful harridan


And finally...

An absolute staple gun of a woman claims she's marrying a ghost after having sex with 20 other, er, ghosts.

Amethyst Realm (Yeah, right) made the claim on an episode of "This Morning" last week.

So, let's get this right.  Most people have never seen a ghost because, well, they don't exist but not only has she been boned by 20 of the blighters she's now marrying one?

Right.  And there's absolutely nothing cuckoo about that at all, right?

This Morning seems to have gone really weird since the old days of Richard and Judy hosting it!  It was one of those shows you only watched when you were off sick from school and it was boring as fuck.  These days Philip Schofield seems to have turned it into a parody show with things like "My vagina is haunted by the ghost of Keith Baron" or "I do poo's that look like Graham Norton".

So, marrying a ghost eh?  I guess when they're reading out the vows the ghost will say, "I dooooooooo!"

And a free bar afterwards?  No beer or wine, just spirits.

How was your Halloween?

I took the dog for a walk and my heart was overjoyed at this little kid dressed as Iron Man (That well known spooky character) who having been down his 3rd driveway in 20 seconds asked his mummy, "Why is nobody in?"

There were entire rows of houses in complete darkness, I had to wonder if there was a war on.

Mind you, as Paul on Facebook said, "I hate all these Trikker Treaters".

Yeah, Paul, they're called that.


Those damn racist...

Road traffic signs


More Facebook Tards

Yes, loads of people are going to "Bomfires" this weekend.  Whatever they are.


And finally...

Trans women are the most important people in the world

Enjoy your weekend, don't get burnt.

Just in time for my annual rant on Halloween!

I'll look forward to seeing kids going Trick or Treating dressed in terrifying outfits such as Spiderman, Elsa from Frozen and Boris Johnson.


The Grauniad has gone too far

The Guradian asked 538 menstruators.  Menstruators?  I think you mean, "Women".

What the fuck is all this shit?  The Guardian really needs to stop with this lefty nonsense about gender.

Firstly, referring to women as "menstruators" is just fucking vile and dehumanises them.

Yes, some women don't or can't have periods, so they're excluded from this survey but surely they don't need to count in the figures anyway?  It doesn't need to be qualified because it clear from the results what the survery is all about.

The argument of "It's not just women who has periods" is utter tosh, because if Trans Men are still menstruating then they're still women.  You're not a Trans Man until you've completed surgery, pills etc.  Until then, you're a Transit Man.


Brexit deal leaked

A secret Brexit deal has been leaked.


Daft American in huge gaff shocker

A stupid American (are there any other kind?) bitch made a huge gaff last week when she declared:

The dickhead, who is President of the Student Union for Southampton University made the claim on Twitter amongst several others (all since deleted) where she wanted to get rid of the mural featuring "white men", because you know, REASONSZ AND GRRL PWR!

Emily, who had zero support for her tweets clearly knows nothing of the history of the mural, which featured several men in gowns.  Said men went off to war in 1916 and never came back.

History is not usually the strong point of Septics, who let's face it have no history, heritage or common sense (shit loads of guns tho, Go ' Merica!) but all this stupid cow could see was what she perceived to be a vanity project featuring men in gowns - and men in gows must be erased BECAUSE MEN IN GOWNS!! (Wooohoo, Go Me!)

Southampton University immediately (and correctly) distanced themselves from the tweets, Emily deleted it and made an apology a 4 year old would be proud of.

Absolute weapon.


Scientific breakthrough

No need for kids anymore, let's grow people!


And finally...

What has happened to all the serial killers?

Until next time, don't have nightmares.

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